GET OVER YOURSELF! Even though it’s not in your nature you have to lighten up if you want any chance of being content. It’s a choice. Don’t make everything so serious because it's not!
When you get flooded with tyrannizing feelings it is imperative that you immediately get out of the analytical mode. That urgent type of thinking that will always keep you trapped. When have you ever been able to think yourself out of a low mood?
I read a book once, no actually many times and parts of it many, many times called Slowing Down to the Speed of Life. It was quite enlightening for me and even though it does not appear to be what I would call a Christian book or by a Christian author much of its content and angle is biblical. That is of the utmost importance to me. I highly recommend this book for gaining insight into the bigger picture of Philippians 4:8 Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things. [note: there is a newer version out now that I have never read. I recommend the version this link takes you to]
How do you get out of the analytical mode? The book calls it "free flow" thinking mode. That was scary to me at first. I thought it implied opening my mind up or rather relaxing it too much and losing control but it's not like that. When you loosen your tightly clenched grip of urgent, analytical thinking something wonderful happens. Your mind relaxes and you realize you are fine and that you don't have to figure it all out. In fact, you CAN'T figure it all out contrary to your previous beliefs that you could. That urgent, frantic, frenzied mental activity gives way to a calmer inner life.
This kind of deliberate ceasing of your overactive mind's thinking also helps attack the perfectionist trait in you that is always attempting to ruin your life. Perfectionistic thinking has always been a part of me and I still to this day have to figure out what to do with it when it tries to run my life. Between you and me I like having perfectionistic tendencies. When they imprison, stifle, and/or paralyze you is when you have to take a step back and become very objective. You have to get out of your own head, unlock the prison door and walk on out. There's no prison guard forcing you to perform to any external standard. It is not imperative or crucial to reach an inner standard that prevails inside of you. Yes, that standard all of us perfectionists wrestle with is real. We certainly don't need to deny that it is a very real thing but we also don't have to let it enslave us.
You know how pretty much everything hurts your feelings? Yes, I get it, others can be harsh, frank, crass, and downright rude, but is it ALWAYS that? Could it be your thinking? This is the time to deliberately get inside of your own head and listen to what you are thinking, to what you are believing. What we are believing underneath it all is what produces all those hurt feelings. Think about it for a minute. You have the opportunity to influence your own feelings by taking responsibility for what you allow yourself to think and believe. I know, it seems like a monumental task to delve into underlying beliefs, but these beliefs are what your feelings hinge on. Actually when you take responsibility for your own thoughts and feelings it provides the platform for you to get out of the self-pity and/or victim mode. If truth be told you get something out of self-pity. You must, why else would you engage in it? Granted, most of the things I am talking about here are below the surface but not as far as you might think. I urge you to take the plunge and start taking responsibility for your own thoughts and feelings. But also my dear Melancholy, don't ever think of your feelings as wrong. Thoughts can be wrong and you can change those which in turn leads to changed feelings. Feelings are always the last to change behind thoughts and actions. You want a faster way to change your feelings? Change your actions!